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Ponies

Do you ever feel like your closest relationships are with fictional characters? The most important people in my life are currently Alicia Florrick from The Good Wife, and Katniss Everdeen. Maybe it’s a winter thing? I fucking hope it’s a winter thing. Analog photos of a dog on Karl–Marx–Straße, the David Bowie memorial outside my old …

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The measure of all things

From the iPhone journal: Kindness  It’s the first thing to go in a relationship that’s in trouble.  Once you stop doing the little things just because doing something for each other brings you joy, once you start counting favors, keeping track, that’s when you know.  Sometimes you don’t see it until it’s too late, and …

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Stay gold

From the iPhone journal:  The moment you realize you like someone, it’s already too late.  It’s kinda like when you’re eating and you realize you’re full. At that point you’ve already been full for a while, and you’re actually about to feel a little sick. Leftover analog photos from my first trip to the abandoned …

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Memories destroy us

From the iPhone journal: Mexico was a year ago. A year ago today i was there, and in a way, i’m still there.  Stuck in a parallel universe, i can watch myself, i can relive my experiences and repeat my mistakes. It’s not always like this. On a regular day i can forget.  On a …

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Whitechapel

If someone were to ask me what 2015 has been like so far, i wouldn’t know what to say yet. So much happened, so many conflicting feelings, so much joy and so much confusion. Like, how do you even begin to describe something that big? It’s like describing the ocean or the person you love. …

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Life in the now

It’s October 1st and i woke up with a strange urge to start fresh, start over. To somehow make this month different than the last one. I normally don’t even notice what today’s date is unless it’s someone’s birthday, but today feels different. I’m not sure how or why, but i think it started yesterday. …

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Pumpkin spice shut the hell up

It’s Sunday, and i don’t have much to write, but i got photos back from the lab on Thursday, and since it’s a rainy day today, i felt like posting a few sunny ones.  I’m still in denial about summer having ended, and every time someone talks about autumn being their faaaavorite season, and how …

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Backup dreams

From the iPhone journal, a while back: This morning i had a weird realization. I’m at a place in my life where i’ve already had everything most of the people around me are working towards. The marriage, the house, the business. A car. Not the babies, obviously, but the possibility of family nonetheless. Stability. Had …

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The feels

“That moment when you realize that you are better alone. Better and happier. Self awareness is such a bitch.” I think i was just so ready for someone to see me. I longed for someone to see me, the real me, so much that i almost fell in love.  Seriously, isn’t that stupid? After everything …

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