Without me here, this would all be unseen. Or if seen, undocumented. Or if documented, then not shared. If shared, then not by me. That’s what I tell myself when I sometimes feel like I’m not supposed to be here. That I should have left back then, and that the reason I struggle so hard …
Tag: Canon AE-1
Give me things that don’t get lost
Mallorca 2019.I don’t remember the how or why, but I guess I had some time off and booked a short vacation, no more than an extended weekend, for myself.I enjoyed my solitude back then as I do now, but I do remember feeling somewhat lonely on this trip. Sitting in a bar texting my girlfriends, …
Saudade
From the future self journal: “It’s still early morning at the house and i can tell it’s gonna be a warm day. It already is. It’s spring. I can hear the birds singing and there’s a lazy gray cat on my bed. She hears them too. Soft light is flooding the bed from the large …
Leer
I still struggle with trying not to divide life into before and after. Before. After. Time seems to stand still in the after, but in reality it’s flying by at the speed of light and the only thing standing still is me. Myself, i’m the one making before always seem heartbreakingly recent. But it’s not. …
Dumb cookie
The things about gossip is that it eventually gets back to the person being gossiped about. I’ve been trying to keep the specific circumstances behind my breakup private, telling only a few of my closest friends what happened. I haven’t blogged about it in detail, i even quit twitter because i didn’t want to accidentally overshare …
So… what are you gonna do now?
Months ago i wrote a thing on my phone about topics that made me uncomfortable when brought up, especially by strangers. I guess i was getting the same questions a lot at the time, and i needed to vent. The same topics aren’t necessarily bothering me now. Actually not much does, it’s one of the …
Pre-dystopia
The world is a very different place than it was when i wrote my last post, isn’t it? We all woke up in a new reality the day after the election. I had tried to stay awake and failed, but i could hear the news anchors talking as i fell in and out of sleep, …
Postcards from the recent past
Today i woke up early, feeling less hungover than i should have considering my Saturday night, so i started editing photos on my old Dell laptop, that only ever comes out of retirement for that very purpose. I then did a 30 minute workout with my flatmate, who also had a late night. Then i …
Home in analog, the sequel
The other day when i was posting about my article in Tätowier Magazin, i noticed that this post was among my three most read posts recently. It’s an old post with analog pictures from my apartment only a few months after i moved in, and as i was looking at the photos, i was struck …
Seestern
A beautiful summer day in Berlin a few weeks ago, before the weather got a little too grey and autumn-like. A Saturday. I was up early, and he had barely slept, and we decided to go to the lake. Me, because i love swimming and going on adventures. Him, mostly because he wanted to make …